[A]I like dirt [C]        [D]   [A]underneath my feet [C]        [D]  
The [B]stuff’s [D]every[E]where, you [B]   just can’t [D]see it [E]  

So I wash my food before I eat, and I wash my face before I sleep
I never lie and I never cheat, and I never sit on a toilet seat

Because I’m a [A]clean freak, squeaky [F#m]clean
I’m the [D]cleanest geek you've ever [B]seen
[E]I’m a squeaky clean, clean freak [A]  

I don’t like movies that aren’t PG13, and I shut my eyes for the scary scenes
I like my mind unsoiled and my conscience clean, I like my eggs well boiled and my tofu lean
I like bad jokes if they aren’t obscene, and I like nice folks who are nice and clean

CHORUS

I don’t like hugs from sweaty people, and I don’t like to share my water bottle
I only buy stuff once I’ve read the label, and I clean my fork underneath the table
I might look like I'm a little unstable, but I do relax whenever I’m able

CHORUS

I try not to speak before I think, and I don’t smoke, I think smoking stinks
I never swear and I never drink, and I don’t really care what other people think
I never click on those steamy links, but I do wash my feet in other people’s sinks

CHORUS

I hold my tongue when I'm feeling pissed, 'cause it makes a mess when I pound my fists
Cleanliness is next to bliss, even the Bible agrees with this
So I clean my cheeks when I get a kiss, even when it’s a pretty miss

CHORUS

Soap and water is my super power, and sanitizer is there in my darkest hour
This doesn’t mean I smell like a flower, in actual fact I often smell sour
But I wash my hands ten times an hour, and whenever I can I like to take a little shower

CHORUS